Sincerely, the Socially Awkward Homeschooler

Dear Naive Society,

Hi! My name is Megan. I am a senior in high school. No, I don't go to the public schools near by, not even the Christian school. I'm homeschooled. Does that surprise you?  When my older sister used to tell people she was homeschooled they would reply with, "But you are so normal!"  When I tell people I am homeschooled they respond more like, "Ohhhh. Now it makes sense!" This is because I am quiet, fairly naive, and often a good dose of awkward among my peers and when people discover I have been homeschooled my whole life, they finally have something to blame it on. After all, how could I have been socialized?

Well, actually, I have been given as many opportunities to socialize as anyone. I go to church, work, sports practices, and youth group on a weekly basis plus a decent amount of just hanging out with friends. I have also reaped social skills in these situations by needing to seek out my friends. I don't get to know people by going to school with them everyday since kindergarten, so I have to ask questions to learn about those around me. Not to mention what I've learned from needing to be intentional about socializing and learning to plan my own events rather than just seeing my friends at school tomorrow or having every weekend filled with school activities. Being homeschooled has not crippled me socially, but caused me to pursue friendships with more intention.

Yet, regardless of my many opportunities and the wealth of social skills that they foster, I would still consider myself a little awkward. This isn't because I was isolated growing up or because I don't have friends, it is because that is just my personality. I am introverted, quiet, quirky, naive, and unstylish. I would be this way if I went to a public school, private school, or sea school! Yes, I am awkward, but blame it on me, not my education.

Sincerely,

The Socially Awkward Homeschooler

P.S. This is not an angry rant by any means! I am not trying to claim homeschoolers have worse or better social skills, but simply calling to mind that they have equal opportunities to socialize as anyone else. I am simply saying that social skills have a lot less to do with where you go to school and a lot more to do with individual personalities. I am not being bitter in the title, just stating a fact that I am awkward and I am homeschooled, but I don't think one flows from the other :)

Christmas Anticipation

It is that time of year when we are all chugging coffee, icing our wrists, and stretching our aching backs as we prepare to take those lovely finals. As we draw our learning days to a close (at least for a few weeks...), we also anticipate Christmas. However, for some reason, between re-taking the ACT and studying for finals, my December hasn't been super Christmassy. This year, I am doing my shopping last minute, have realized  I hate most Christmas music, and haven't had time to see even one Christmas movie! But I have been reading the Old Testament for a Bible class.

All semester I have been reading about how God called, made a covenant with , and has been faithful to His people, despite all their unfaithfulness. Now I have come to the prophets. They tell of judgement to come through the exile, but also of a Messiah who will fulfill God's promises and renew the nations. Then, this morning, I woke up to my sister playing Christmas carols. All the sudden, I was filled with the same anticipation as the Jews had. The Messiah! He is coming! Now is the time!

So, really, this year I am celebrating Christmas the most because I fully understand it. God's story does not begin in the stable, it climaxes there. All my previous Christmases I have missed the thousand years of waiting that came before this little baby's birth. Jesus coming into the world was God fulfilling His final promise, and I can't wait to celebrate!

"And I will betroth you to me forever. I will betroth you to me in righteousness and in justice, in steadfast love and mercy. I will betroth you to me in faithfulness. And you shall know the LORD." -- Hosea 3:19-20

"And the angel said to them, 'Fear not, for behold, I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, who is Christ the Lord. And this will be a sign for you: you will find the baby wrapped in swaddling cloths and lying in a manger.' And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God and saying,

'Glory to God in the highest,
and on earth peace among those with whom he is pleased!'"-- Luke 2:10-14

Rejoice

Rejection is painful. It burns in my eyes, heart, and pit of my stomach. It makes me want to change myself to become worthy. Ruining my day. Making me want to run away. Filling me with anger, hurt, and confusion.

Rejection makes me want to curl up in a cave of fear and isolation. It makes me forget the overflowing joy my life has.

I wrote a post a while back about God having only the best planned for me. I have to remind myself of this truth in times of rejection. I have to know that the absences causing me pain are NOT God rejecting me, but Him protecting me. It hurts at the moment, but I know God does not withhold any good thing from His children. He loves me and has blessed me in immeasurable ways, which He graciously magnifies in times of brokenness. 

When we are rejected, it is tempting to retreat and mull it over. Which to some extent it is good to take times like these to evaluate where you're dependence lies: In the opinions of a valued friend or in the opinion of God. Yet, we must force ourselves to go on with life. Just because one person abandoned you, does not mean you are abandoned. There are most likely many people who love you and value who you are without alterations. So in this time of rejection, choose to rejoice. Rejoice in the joy and fun and love that your life is full of. Look forward to opportunities that are available, not lost. And, most importantly, know that God has given you acceptance that outweighs all the rejection this world can throw at us.