into the unknown

 Everyone comes into college with a plan. The first week I was here I got asked the same questions over and over again: "What is your major? What would you like to do with that?" For me, the answers to these two questions always seemed to have a disconnect. My major is Professional Writing (think journalism, business writing, technical writing), but my passion is to write devotionals, books, and articles for young women about how God's grace embraces their lives and what that looks like everyday as we work in every pursuit.

This disconnect combined with my utter love for my Bible class and boredom in my professional writing classes has caused me to seriously consider switching my major to something more suited to my hopes for future vocation.

But what about my terrible blogging record these past few months? If this is really my "passion" shouldn't I be producing a lot more of that kind of writing?

There is a lot of doubt concerning my future in more areas than one. All my plans have been confused and I am discovering passions I hadn't paid attention to before.

It is a weird feeling for a planner to not be able to set up five year goals or even a goal for the end of the week. Yet through my lack of organization, God has taught me the sweetest lesson about trusting Him for each day.

 I don't know what I want to do with my major anymore, I don't even know what my major will be next semester, but I know today my job is to love and minister to everyone I interact with. I am learning to die to myself and trust God. I don't want to leave a legacy, I want Jesus to be magnified so no one else is visible, just Him and His grace.